Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
