that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
