I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
