Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
