so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
