I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
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