so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
