I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
