Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
