Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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