I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
