Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
