just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
