hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
