Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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