You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
