I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
