so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
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