Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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