Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
