Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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