Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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