I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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