hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
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