I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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