so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
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