Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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