Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
