Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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