would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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