You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
