i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
of course. lets lasso hookers.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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