when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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