so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
