It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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