Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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