I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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