You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize