it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
