You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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