another moral hangover. fuck.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize