Well douche your snatch and let's go!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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