People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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