Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Dicks are not precious.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
