It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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