Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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