I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
