do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize