I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize