Heybabeimwearingurpanties
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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